Apples and Trees and Somesuch

Magnolia is going through a rough spell.  She's 10, she's tall, she's smart, she's bigger than a lot of her friends (in kind of a tall and solid sort of way), she's not super graceful, and she's perceptive enough to notice these things and be sensitive about them.  She's also smart enough where her brain starts going and going and often rushes to judgement in a very negative way (usually, bearing the brunt of the negativity, as self induced psychological trauma) (ie- Those kids decided to play tag, but no one specifically invited me to play tag so they don't want me to play tag with them, and actually, come to think of it, I don't think they like me at all...no, I think they hate me and they are mocking me with their tag playing!!).  It's exhausting, heart breaking, and sometimes, really freaking annoying. 

So, when this kid comes home with a story where she actually faces down issues straight on, I praise, I cheer, I exhalt her into the stratosphere, because I'm SO excited she didn't go to the timid negative place, I can't even help myself.  

A few weeks ago, Magnolia heard me finish the Pledge of Allegiance with "...with liberty and justice for some", which is how I always finish it.  She asked me why I had said that, and I told her that until there is marriage equality, among other issues, I just plain don't agree with saying "for all".  Evidently, she copied me in class today, and in her words, "I was maybe a little loud about it".  I asked her what happened and she said her teacher "whipped her head around and said "why did you say THAT?  That isn't how we finish the pledge!"  So I asked "and then what happened?" And she said, "well, I said that my family is in favor of gay marriage being legalized and it's not fair to say "for all" until that happens", which evidently resulted in significant classroom snickering.  I am pretty sure my chest swelled up even more than usual.  I told her she was awesome.  I asked her how she felt about it, and she said that she felt pretty amazing.  I told her that this issue is the civil rights issue of our time, and that just like the civil rights leaders who fought for women's rights, and African American rights, she was encountering resistance by her peers...but that she was making the decision to do so because it was the right thing to do, despite it not being the popular thing to do.  I told her repeatedly that I was proud of her and had her repeat the story for Michael, who echoed my sentiments. 

So, you know, I'll take the kid who takes things too personally and who assumes the worst sometimes...cause I also have the kid who stands up for the things that she knows are right, and who does it despite being ACTUALLY mocked.  I'm often proud of my kids, but tonight, I was ready to buy her a pony.  Please, don't tell her that.  I don't want to have to take care of a pony.