Things I Like

(repost from old blog, from May of 2008, but still very applicable...)

The ceiling fans in my house
The freckles on Magnolia's nose
A good episode of Law and Order
Jeremy Sisto (yum)
My new Target panties
Singing on stage
Our bed
How Michael's hand has to touch his belly when he sleeps
Max's curls
The way Xena picks up whatever is closest to her to try to control her own bark when she can't help it.
Fabric
Our Backyard
Good Burritos
The way I feel doing my 3rd downward dog
Dusting
Nesting Dolls
Camp during devotions
Making Stuff
The first tomato of the summer (homegrown)
Dinner with an old friend
The looks I get when I talk about the fact that I keep chickens
When I come home to a clean kitchen
Getting a sale on Etsy
Watching the kids in the ocean
Cleavage
That Whitney won ANTM
Grace before meals
Text messages
Sunscreen
Pedicures
Gift Cards
Feeling Productive
Berries
Jumping in waves
Catching a wave on my boogie board
Ice Cream
Laughing until I can't breathe
Dancing with Michael
Waking up without an alarm

It's Funny

Life can change so quickly. Expected, unexpected...the changes just keep coming. In 2008 I experienced a horrible life change. 20% of my immediate family all of a sudden getting sick and dying. Yes, it was only one person, but the 5 of us were a team. An often dysfunctional and sometimes weirdly codependant team, but a team nonetheless. And in 48 days we went from 5 to 4. I felt all the stages of grief. I still feel like I cycle through them, even though it has been over a year since Mimma passed. I am a different person because of it.

2009 has brought forth change as well. Sometime in March, I asked the shy, quiet construction worker with the incredible opera voice in my musical theater class if he'd sing a song with me. The song was A Little Priest, from Sweeney Todd. It was the most fun I've had in my class. When our showcase performance was over, I got more accolades from random audience members than I have ever gotten in my life...and Michael insisted it was time. It was time for me to get back on stage for real.

When I got the email from my teacher, I didn't think much of it. It was announcing that one of our vocal coaches was music directing a musical, Nunsense, in the West Valley and they were having auditions the next week. The audition conflicted with a camp directors' meeting. The show conflicted with camp. After much discussion (M and I do nothing with simplicity) we decided it was worth trying. The process could be a blog post in and of itself, but to keep it brief, I'll just say- I got the part.

The process has brought me to tears of happiness, of anger, of frustration, and of pure joy...and with all of that it has given me a gift I had all but given up on. It gave me back my passion. From the day my stepmother chastised me for telling a dinner guest who asked what I was interested in that I was an actress ("Don't call yourself that, it's pretentious and it makes it seem like you're saying you're a professional, which you are not. No one pays you.") to the day that my HS counselor told me I needed to lose weight to land better parts to the day my college boyfriend suggested I work on costumes to continue my work in theater post graduation and beyond...the roads all led me away. I am back now. And it's really quite wondrous. I can't believe I let it lie for as long as I did.

So I advise, if you have something you love doing that you don't do...stop not doing it.